For those of us who have lost a spouse, it is natural to wonder if we are okay as we suffer without them.
We can only see the things around us with our eyes, and sometimes our situation in the middle of our grief and pain distorts our vision.
It is hard to know that paradise awaits us when our time in this life has ended, and the wait is the most challenging part.
Our minds begin to wonder about them, and our mind starts playing tricks on us.
All we can see is our loneliness and despair, leaving us wishing our loved ones would just come back.
After Cindy died, I had someone walk up to me and say, "Don't you wish she would come back?"
My response was, "You know, I miss her more than my words can express, but I would not ask her to return from paradise to an imperfect world and imperfect husband."
One thing that brought me peace was that Cindy was in the presence of God. In the Bible, Revelations 21-22, John tries to describe Heaven, but all he can use is metaphors.
God created the heavens and the earth.
Heaven is so beautiful John used words like a sea of glass, crystal, pure gold as pure as glass, jasper walls adorned with every kind of precious stone, chalcedony, emerald, sapphire, and gates of pearl.
These metaphors help us relate to their indescribable beauty.
Wow! No wonder John had difficulty describing Heaven.
These beautiful places here on earth are breathtakingly beautiful but are nothing to what awaits us.
At times we are understandably sad, lonely, and hurt. It is not easy, but remind yourself that your spouse is now in the presence of their Creator. That alone is enough.
I look forward to living in an indescribable place where no sin, sickness, death, or decay exists. The Bible states several times that they are sleeping and waiting for Jesus to return.
I told someone once that I would be selfish if I wanted her back to comfort me when she was in a better place.
When I get alone and think, it gives me peace. I can continue the plans we had made, raise our children, and live a productive life of which she would be proud.
Created as a vapor that is here today and gone tomorrow, but for those who trust God, leaving this world is just the beginning of something better.
When I gain that peace and perspective and realize who is in control, I can celebrate and be thankful for our time together.
I do not know what God has in store for me in this life, but I do know what He has planned when this life is over, and so it is with your spouse who has preceded you in death.
Do we miss them? Of course. Do we understand everything that happened or is happening? Of course not! What we can count on is God's truth.
We, at times, may feel abandoned, but that is a feeling of our flesh and not our spirit. God has never forgotten any of His children, and He has not forgotten you either.
Now, all I can do is stand in His presence on earth and praise Him for not ignoring me.
When I allow Him to do so, I can feel his presence, and so can you.
I wrote this today to hopefully bring you comfort and a different vision of how to remember your spouse. I know many of us are struggling with a devastating loss representing one-half of who we are.
When we married and became one flesh, her death felt like I was being ripped apart.
No amount of truth could change that at that time. The reason is that when we love a lot, we grieve a lot. We do not want to hear that they are in a better place, etc. We wish to grieve, which is part of the process. That is how it should be.
Writing this article for those who are wondering why. Why did my spouse leave me?
I don't believe there is an answer to this side of Heaven. Some solutions come with you; allow yourself time to grieve.
All we can do is be thankful for our time together and allow the Lord to provide for our needs.
I hope today finds you in a good place.
You are encouraged to pray for each other as we find peace through our grief.
I pray for you daily and am thankful you are here with us. I would love to know your thoughts! God bless you!
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